In Memory of My Brother

Thom

Thom was one that traveled to the beat of his own drum. I always remember as a young child looking up to him. For after all he was my older brother. He and I were 5 years apart, at times that seem to be such a vast age difference, other times it seemed that I was the older one.

He always managed to make me laugh when I was down. And at the same time, he was one that would make me GRRRR. You were never quite sure what mood he would put you in.

I recall one Christmas many years ago, things were tight. It was coming close to that magical hour and we still did not have a Christmas tree. And to me there was no Christmas without a tree. My brother came to my rescue, he left saying he would be back, we had no clue where he was heading. All I know is I sat and waited for his return. After what seemed like hours to me he finally arrived. In a jolly mood yelling HO HO HO and dragging behind him the most beautiful tree I ever saw. We had fun setting it up and getting ready for Santa to arrive. 

As Christmas day came, we had our usual fan fare of the day. Then came the dreaded nite... I have no clue what set him off, but what ever it was, it made him so angry that he stormed into the living room... and right before my eyes yanked that tree that we decorated just the nite before and threw it out the door. 

As I grew older I came to realize that was Thom, I never loved him any less. Can honestly say I never fully understood him. But, he was my brother, and I accepted him as he was, his good and his bad. As we grew older we became a little closer, I never really managed to get inside of him, as the years passed I never felt the need to try. It was easier just to love and accept him for who he was. 

I was the one that the hospital called on that cold snowy morning. They did not tell me what was wrong but to get there as soon as I could. I remember yelling at him as I drove, for he knew how I hated to drive in the snow. The closer I got to the hospital the funnier I started to feel. I felt as if I needed to be there NOW, I needed to hurry as fast as I could and be by his side.

I finally arrived, but was too late to be with him, for he had all ready passed. The staff did not want me to go in alone to see him, they kept insisting that I call another family member. I stood there with tears in my eyes, I was the one you called, I was the one he had next of kin, I am the one here, and you are going to let me in now to see him.

They finally gave up their fight and let me in to see him. I was not quit sure how I would handle what I was about to see. I felt myself shaking, walking slowly in the room. And there he was... laying peacefully. I stood there for what seemed to me like hours, but was only minutes. I walked closer as the tears poured down my face. I bent over, kissed his cheek, told him how I loved him, and how he would be missed.

He now sleeps in heaven. And he no longer alone. For now my Mother and brother Stephen has joined him. How sad it is for the rest of us left behind, But I know in my heart my Mother is full of joy being up in heaven with her two sons.

I love you all, and miss you so very much. Please keep us in your heart for some day we shall be with you again.